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Equity vs. Equality -or- What Will New Jersey Do Next? Focus, People! ... A Fresh Vision for GCB - or - Why There's Been Fewer Posts and Why There Will Be More Soon Dirty Tricks, Coming Out, Settling Down, Leading and Other Late Nite Ponderments The Changing Face of Marriage A Coming Out Story All You Need Is ... Love? Commitment? Hope? We Cannot Run and Hide Parents ... Can't live with 'em, Can't shoot 'em "I have this dream of beauty and hope." It's GLBT History Month "Somedays I Feel As If I'm At War With Myself" Dangerous, Hypocritcal, Cowardly Boycott! A Public Record of Homobigot Activists Intimidation Tactics Call to Action: Ryan White Act Do These Genes Make Me Look Gay? 1, 2, 3 ... Breathe! Faith in the Face of Fearsome Financial Frustration Open Thread Blind Faith "Christian" "Rights" ? The Importance of Friendly Churches Self Delusion is Fun! The Christian Brand Sprucing Things Up a Bit Literal Two Edged Swords: Weaponized Religion Equality For All, The Fast Way Another Reason For Gay Marriage From Around The Web ... Because When You're Robbed, You Need Your Husband Blogroll Updating The Cause For A Cure Sanctity Distrust From All Sides Just When You Think You Know Someone "And On The Eighth Day ... Punishment? Not My God. Tired ... Hope Among The Heroes > Full Archive < |
Focus, People! ... A Fresh Vision for GCB - or - Why There's Been Fewer Posts and Why There Will Be More SoonPosting-lag can kill a blog. That is something that has been rattling around in my brain for a while now as my own posts get further apart than when they started 11 months ago. A year ago it seemed there was a lot more going on that and a lot more to talk about. Today, if ever so slightly, the winds have changed and indeed, my own focuses have changed. Don’t get me wrong – the fundamentalists are just as vile as ever. So-called ex-gays continue to spout nonsense and anecdotal opinion while making up whatever facts that “support” them. Fundamentalists in government continue to impose religious and discriminatory law, violating the very freedoms and equalities that made this Nation great in the first place. And the AFA continues to boycott anything that sneezes equality. But what I’ve begun to sense is that the fundamentalists losing their credibility in the world with increasing speed, and they’re getting obsessively desperate as a result. Remember this from May of this year? A day or two after we all heard it on the news, Pat Robertson says God told him all special-like that “the coasts of America will be lashed by storms.” Right… and how many hurricanes hit the US this year? This is the same guy who has blamed any and every natural disaster or terrorist attack on gay people over the last decade, as well as declared our government should assasinate the president of Venezuela. Who takes this guy seriously anymore? Really, very few. And really, the decreasing amount of news coverage the Falwell/Dobson/Robertson/Phelps machine gets is for entertainment value more than anything else. Don’t get me wrong, I love my faith and it remains as strong as I can hope for; but I’m angry about what’s been done to it, and I’m angry about how wretched so many fundamentalists and evangelicals really are. Focusing on them, following them, debating them and even trying to carry on a decent conversation with them can be fruitless and, after a while, boring. Words alone will never convince them, and if there’s anything to trend statistics, it shows us that the bottom 15-30% of a group of people will never give up their ideological strongholds regardless of what immorality it demans of them. So over the last few weeks, between the long hours at work and the relaxing times home with the Beau settling into our snazzy new crib, I’ve been debating with myself what exactly I should be focusing on with this blog. In general, I find I’ve more or less settled along a number of common themes: 1. Fundamentalists are generally Hardheaded, Unthinking, and Needlessly, Inhumanly Vitriolic. 2. There is a real hope for an HIV/AIDS cure in the near future. 3. Gay Christians exist, are loved by God, find true love and have a varied experience in this world that deserves a voice in the Conversation. 4. In history there has been no example for how to live a moral and godly life as a gblt person, but looking forward we gay Christians, who are finding a voice, have a responsibility to set that example and lead our communities. 5. Marriage Equality will invariably and undeniably set the stage for healthy and stable relationships, communities, and nations. We desire nothing less, nothing more, than the rights and responsibilities of marriage. There is little I can do on a national or blogospheric scale to combat the fundamentalists head on. I’ve grown tired of their refusal to converse and reason and masking with it platitudes of agape and (mis-)understanding. They bore me, and I find myself prone to mocking and screwing with them, which is just too easy. I don’t want to be that kind of person, and there are already a ton of blogs that I enjoy and respect that handle their hypocritical doublespeak very well. So that is not really a focus for this blog. HIV/AIDS is not a focus either. There are a number of posts here and I continue to advocate the World Community Grid FightAIDS@Home project. HIV touches us all. It is not a gay disease, it is a human crisis that transverses the world and kills indiscriminately painfully. I have hope, and continue to do my part to further the cure, but that is not my venue. Being HIV negative I can never lend the voice that fully understands the life of those living with HIV, and not being a researcher or a scientist I can’t speak much to the research being made. As a human, I can fight, but it’s not my role to lead here. Gay Christians exist, and there are lot more of us blogging these days than there were 12-18 months ago. This community grows and gains a voice, and it gains support of well-spoken straight allies. Not one of us individually will ever encapuslate the voice of the many. We must continue to speak together, sharing our voices and opinions and beliefs and move collectively toward the goals of equality. We must engage with one another, commenting on each others blogs, encouraging one another, and reminding each other that we all exist, and we have a voice. But something I’ve seen less of is a voice of example for healthy relationship. Growing up, we all had an example of some kind of healthy relationship. We learned, somehow from someone, how love grows and exhibits itself healthfully in real life. We learn from our parents how to live, how to get married, how to raise children … as straight people. But few gay people have grown up with validation of who we are wired to love, and as such, all we’re left with as an example is the carnal culture we see on the Internet. That’s not good. Moreover, as our community moves from adolescence into getting a grip on itself, we still need to learn, on the whole, what it means to be in good relationship. And we need examples. It’s all good to sit around and say we need examples, but gets us nowhere. So in talking it over and evaluating how we should seek to influence those around us, we will be adjusting to focus of This Gay Christian’s Blog. We will continue to write posts that highlight the gay Christian experience, gay rights and the fight for equality, just like we always have. More and more I’ll be highlighting the great posts and thinking from other strong gay Christian bloggers around the ‘sphere. But the Beau will be joining me in more regular posting focus about the daily life of two men who love each other and are committed to each other and to a relationship rooted in God’s love. The Beau and I are very different people with very different perspectives on things – and we want to share more of our regular life, points of view and thought processes on the things that make up what we believe is a healthy, gay, Christian relationship in modern society. Sure I’ve talked about our relationship from time to time and how much we love each other all that, but now you’ll begin hear from both us about the good, the bad and the ugly. Maybe some of it will be boring. Maybe some of it practical. Hopefully it will be encouraging, And all of it will be real. We have a few topics in mind, but will always happily entertain questions, comments and suggestions, and as always – accepting op-ed posts and comments. We’re not sure what the new posting frequency will look like, but we expect several posts a week. So check back, add GCB to your feed reader, and please continue to join the conversation. To the next phase of our collective journey, – the blogger and the beau
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I love the new focus you’re outlining for the blog. It’s very encouraging.
My first visit to the site, and I like the new direction you’ve outlined. While I don’t consider myself Christian, my husband and I have worked to root our relationship in spirituality. A challenging, make-it-up as you go endeavor precisely because, as you’ve underscored, we have no models.
Coincidentally, just today we discussed having him add his insights to my blog. We’ll see if that happens, but the idea seems right.
Good luck and I’ll be around.
Thanks GCB for speaking into us like this. I agree, we need to see more of the journeys of those in healthy relationship. Having not been in one yet (a relationship, that is) I can’t write about such things personally. But when i do, i’ll try to be more intentional about sharing that part of the journey with the ‘sphere to contribute to our communal examples of healthy relationships.
I look forward to reading about yours!
I love the idea of developing topics around healthy relationship dynamics. I channel-surfed into a Dr. Phil show the other day, and couldn’t bear to watch more than a minute or two of the intra-family dysfunction and violence. Sometimes the nanny shows are a bit more tolerable, but not always. Those tend to focus most on the folks needing the most remedial of support; I’m more interested in being spoken to as someone with reasonably good, compassionate, interpersonal skills. What can we learn to be better at is my interest, more than how closely we can come to toxic relationship dynamics before pulling back from the brink.
And, when it comes to blog activity and popularity, I have a lot of respect for folks who don’t let the hope of traffic get ahead of their creative drive and energy. I’m happier with a few friends tracking me and linking to the intermittent posts that touch them in some fashion than feeling like I’m competing for attention.
Keep up the great work!
Yes, the gay christian blogosphere is growing all over the world. I’m French and created my blog in 2004. You can see a list of gay christians websites on my blog. Jean-Marc
I didn’t know who I was until I realized there were others like me and that they weren’t sitting around looking dejected from being rejected. I now believe that since I was young God showed me that I was gay, and that I could love that way and love, and be loved, no less, by that same God. Now is the time to stand up against those hypocrites like that preacher, another one, what’s his name, that preached against homosexuality but was one himself. When I was young I had the town “hunk” and a “jock” for a boyfriend and we loved each other.He would have to admit that, but go a step further and admit that there really wasn’t anything wrong when we were in love.It was more than sex, we deeply related and believed the same things. We both later became Christians, but he married and we have never discussed our past since. I think he needs to know that he was OK then, and OK now, I just won’t let him turn around and try to pull a moral thing on me when I never loved Jesus more than I do and he can’t hide behind his marriage if he was still gay. This revelation of freedom happened after my boyfriend of the last 5 years left me on New years Eve. He and I had met in a bar and instantly fell in love. It lasted until we both ended up in the same church, albeit, a fairly ‘open’ church, but we never lived together. Another “Christian” named “ED” who I had kinown in the past for being a jerk; He once made me “jump” up for 5 dollars I needed. ED told my EX, JP, that because we had “sex” (I never called it or thought of it as merely sex, I never “fuck” I make love and we were monogomas),JP and I would end up in Hell. So JP is being scared back into the closet and breaking my heart was all this “Christian” achieved. This broke my heart when JP told me over the phone what ED had put in his mind. I am horribly broken hearted and I can’t return to that Church. But at least I know and I’m proud to be, a gay Christian who has other “brothers and sisters ” out there going through the same thing. It’s time we rose up and put these hypocrites where they belong. In a cold shower!!!—Love eternal,
PaulYes as Christian myself i agree Jesus does love you. Gay or bi. He gave his life for all and became sin for all. Therefore all were dead. Jesus loves us all even the prostitute. And after all departed He said, Go AND SIN NO MORE. Really i suppose a good question would be. Does God Think homosexuality is a SIN, of need of forgiveness. Then we’d have to ask ourselves,” If it is a sin in need of forgiveness, is is set before the cross of Jesus Christ?”
As one who is struggling with who I am, I will definitely try to keep up with the new posts on this blog, as well as read from the archives. For several months, I’ve been convinced that God will deliver me from homosexuality. But as of yesterday actually, I’m in the middle, and I’m not as convinced as I was.
I love to see this site highlight relevant books like the groundbreaking new novel “The God Box” by Alex Sanchez ( author of the award winning Rainbow Boys trilogy ). “The God Box” is a novel about gay teens who are also active Christians and how there is no contradiction in that. You can read more on Alex’s site : www.alexsanchez.com
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